Satan: So, you’re an extortionist. How do you like the job?

Troll: I love it. I mean what’s more gratifying than making money off other people’s hard work?

Satan: Excuse me, but isn’t that kind of lazy? I mean, whatever happened to an honest work ethic?

Troll: That’s kind of contradictory coming from a devil.

Satan: A devil?! Try THE DEVIL you little troll. And I didn’t become THE DEVIL by leeching off the hard work of other people. I earned it. You should try it.

Troll: Sorry, no can do.

Satan: I hope you like the heat.

Troll: What’s that supposed to mean?

Satan: I’ll be putting you to work soon, Clown Shoes.

A Bodog supporter shows where her loyalty lies.

Click the above photo to see the raw, NSFW version, of this ambitious method of support!

Send in your shots today. If they’re anything like this one, we’ll probably post them.

I’ve taken some time

Coming up with a rhyme

To let the world know

Of my deep personal blow

At first hit with sadness

That descended into madness

I put pen to paper

To describe this heinous caper

I built up a brand

From nothing but sand

With blood sweat and tears

I was successful for years

Then all of a sudden

Quick as a button

In swooped a troll

Demanding a toll

I tried not to pay

Not to give him his way

But he couldn’t be beaten

And my profits were eaten

So let this be a lesson

To count all your blessin’s

And keep you’re your eyes open

For those slimy little bastards

Send in your own patent troll inspired poetry, songs and artwork.  

The Save Bodog Street Team and I have completed our first major flyer campaign by plastering the streets of New York City, and besides the odd near by store owner yelling “Save This!” and blowing us the finger for completely covering the side of their building, it was a huge success.

The locals walking by were very inquisitive as we were flyering, asking such questions as (and I’m not going to censor this), “What the fuck is savebodog.com?” and “Maybe you should make a flyer that says ‘Save Britney Spears’, she’s the one that really needs the help dipshit“. That guy was almost going to need his own poster saying save (his name), from me smacking him over the head with my clipboard full of patent troll petitions.

Anyways, besides being called a “dipshit” I was happy with the response. A lot of people that I talked to in New York had already heard about what happened to Bodog and thought what we were doing at savebodog.com was really great.

Anyone who didn’t already know what happened to Bodog.com or what patent trolls are, I had no problem filling them in on how they are blood sucking jerk offs just looking for money to pay for more lawyers to sue more companies because they don’t know how to make money running their own successful business… and so on and so forth.

We will be continuing with more campaigns and I’ll be sure to keep you updated!

Found this the other day, thought you guys might like it…
Patent Trolls
(C)Copyright 2006 Jimmy Bear Pearson

They got nothin’ to do
But to make trouble for me and you
Sittin’ round all day
Thinkin’ up their games to play
Sittin’ ’round
All ’round town
Tryin’ to catch someone
Doin’ somethin’ good.

Patent Trolls
Patent Trolls
Patent Trolls got nothin’ to lose
They got no mortgage
Kid don’t need no shoes
Patent Trolls, they got nothin’ to lose
Goin’ make us all sing the blues.

Don’t ask me why
The sun’s up in the sky
Don’t ask me why
Gonna patent that, too.
Lawyers come a-callin’, sayin’
Gotta pay to sing the blues.

Patent Trolls Got No Souls
Got no place to call home
Patent Trolls Got No Souls
Got no place to call home.

Patent Trolls
Gonna have my lawyer call ya!
Habeas Corpus?
Hey, didn’t you use that text
I got in my patent?
Well, you gotta pay a license for it!

Patent Trolls
Got No Souls
Got no place to call home
Patent Trolls…

Many small towns have been unable to keep up with the demand for candles as vigils grow in numbers. In response to this incredible need, daily candle making classes have become the new hot thing. And in a nice karmic twist, many of those affected by this tragedy have reported candle making itself to be very healing.

If you want to start candle light vigils in your town download a candle making recipe here

In an incredible show of solidarity, supporters of Bodog.com have begun prying the addresses off of their homes.

“As long as Bodog must exist without its true address, so will we” shouted one angry supporter.

The postal and pizza delivery industries seem most affected by this current turn of events.

All over the world Bodog Girls are staging public protests to speak out against their stolen URL.

“It’s like, without bodoggirls.com I feel totally naked” moaned one of the stunning protesters. “Before all of this, I always felt safe behind our URL. Now it’s been stolen and locked away by some slimy rat bastard lawyer. Do you know how exposed that makes us feel? That’s why we’ve organized this naked protest. We want the world to see what we’re going through.”

Follow the Bodog Girls’ brave example and let us know how this act of tech-terrorism has affected you.

A URL hangs in the balance as millions of Bodog Players wander the streets lost and alone.

Newbodog.com is supporting all of Bodog’s traffic but many players are still feeling distraught. Countless individuals have reported feeling like they’ve lost a piece of themselves. Many have fallen into a deep depression from which they fear they may never recover.

In response to this wave of sadness, support groups have sprung up all over the world. If you’re one of those affected, don’t suffer alone. Find a group in your town today.